Ah, Time Freedom. Now, How To Use It?

Recently, I took some books I have read in the last 10 years down off the shelf to review. One of them is a book called How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free by Ernie Zelinski.

I think I am going to enjoy rereading this book. I was still working when I first read it.

That was a different time.

In the preface, he has a very funny quote that is somewhat true to my experience so far:

“Retirement is the time when you never do all the things you intended to do when you’d have the time.”

He attributes this to someone named Laurence J. Peter.

I have no idea who that is, but it is so true.

Think about all the things you’ve said yes to but never got around to doing.

In the preface, he goes on to talk about what will happen if you try to use your new time freedom for leisure, but you’ve never learned how to enjoy leisure.

How will that go for you?

Honestly, I don’t remember the last time I could fully let go and enjoy leisure.

I think it was probably when I was still in early grade school.

Just this morning, and yesterday morning, and most likely the morning before that, within the first few minutes of waking, I was already thinking to myself:

“Oh jeez, I better get moving or the day will slip away.”

It’s a tense feeling. A feeling of not having enough time. A feeling that I am wasting time by not getting started.

I actually stopped myself and asked, so what? Where is that push coming from?

A lifetime of conditioning. That’s the only answer I could come up with.

Zelinski goes on to talk about how most people have a very similar vision of what post-working-for-a-paycheck life will be like.

It will include things like:

• No deadlines.

• No rushing.

• No rush-hour traffic.

• No mean bosses.

• Traveling to exciting places.

• Sleeping in late each morning.

• Hanging out at your favorite coffee shop or such.

The total freedom to do what you want, whenever and wherever you want to do it.

Oh yes, those are part of the dream.

But read the first quote again at the top of this article.

It’s harder than it looks, as the great Bon Scott once sang.

This is why so many People experience problems post-FIRE or traditional retirement.

It’s why people replace their old jobs with new ones.

Or they get on the social media side-hustle bandwagon.

Or, God forbid, they try the cliché trope of writing a book at a coffee shop.

All that is fine, but do those new things really matter?

Or are you just filling the void left by no longer having the structure of a working life?

Or filling up time that used to be spent raising and caring for your kids?

That’s the key.

You must find, know, and apply how you use your time to things that matter.

If not, you drift.

And Your post-working-for-a-paycheck life will not be the dream you thought it would be.

And before you know it, it’s over.

I saw this happen to my dad.

He retired at 70 and, unfortunately, died two days after his 73rd birthday.

He Did spend his two to three years of retirement doing some things he wanted to do.

He bought and tried to learn how to ride a big Harley-type motorcycle. That was a flop. But at least he tried.

Three of his co-workers and he had gotten their pilot licenses and They bought a single-engine propeller plane to fly.

But he/They had sold it by the time he retired.

One of his buddies got him a job driving cars between states for dealerships.

I think he enjoyed that, being on the road.

It sounds like he got himself into a little trouble every now and then, in a good way.

And he liked to go to the casino to play poker.

I think it was something to do.

He probably liked the challenge of learning how to play, and It was a relatively inexpensive way to get out of the house and have some fun.

Have a few laughs. See some idiots blow all their hard-earned pay.

Perhaps win versus lose a round of poker. Maybe meet a lady or such.

That was how we got connected after several years of not really seeing or talking to each other.

He ran into one of my best friends, who convinced the two of us to reconnect.

He came to visit me on three separate occasions, and I am grateful for those times we had together.

When I was growing up, he was a strict, authoritarian-type father who believed in corporal punishment, or just plain old knocking the crap out of you if you weren’t living by his rules.

He could be just plain mean at times, resentful, and full of anger. He seemed to have hated the life he had created for himself.

Thankfully, he had mellowed quite a bit, and I grew to appreciate him more as a result of his visits.

He took one of my books home with him on the last trip.

It was Inner Revolution by the Tibetan Buddhist scholar Robert Thurman.

It seemed to bring him some peace and understanding.

Then, only about two months later, he was gone.

End of retirement.

On his last visit out, he had told me not to believe in the bullshit of your “golden years” as being the best ever.

We were out walking, and he had to sit down, and that spurred the comment.

He was starting to have some health issues, but he didn’t go into details with me.

Well, that was a longer cautionary tale than I intended to write.

But it brings the point home.

This is it.

You get this life, and time will run out.

What are you going to do with it?

My advice?

Discover what moves you and use your time on those things that matter.