Gratitude or Ecstasy?

Let’s talk about gratitude.

You’ve probably heard of the practice of keeping a daily gratitude journal where you write down a few things each day for which you are thankful.

The idea, as I understand it, is that if you intentionally focus on what is good, meaningful, or working well in your life, your perspective gradually shifts in a healthier direction.

And evidently there is quite a bit of social science research supporting this. Participants who engage in gratitude practices often report increases in subjective well-being and overall life satisfaction over time.

I can believe it.

I actually did this journaling practice myself for a few years. It was relatively easy to do and I certainly didn’t dislike it. But, I’m not sure I noticed any dramatic internal changes from it either.

A lot of it felt like trying to find silver linings.

And I also realized that I have an adverse internal reaction to the word gratitude itself.

This may sound unfair, but the word often strikes me as somewhat passive. A little soft. Almost overly accepting.

Again, I understand the value in it, but I find myself wanting something more exhilarating than simply learning to appreciate what already exists.

Which raises an interesting question for me:

Is there something beyond gratitude?

Not necessarily instead of gratitude, but beyond it. Is there another mode of experiencing life that feels more alive, energized, vibrant, and emotionally electric?

In yesterday’s article, I talked about my 12-hour drive this week and how I intentionally left podcasts out of the experience. Normally, during long drives, I fill the empty space with information. Podcasts, interviews, YouTube discussions converted to audio, educational content, productivity ideas, philosophy conversations…something.

This time I didn’t.

I spent long stretches simply driving and thinking.

And during a couple moments on that drive, I had a very interesting internal experience. I suddenly felt an immense sense of exhilaration rise up inside me. My chest swelled, I felt energized and intensely alive, and for a few moments I experienced something that felt very close to what I would describe as ecstasy.

One of those moments happened while I was driving past a long line of trees with dense forest stretching behind them. The scene was beautiful, certainly, but it felt like more than merely appreciating scenery. It reminded me of past road trips and periods of my life that felt adventurous, expansive, and liberating.

But interestingly, it did not feel like nostalgia.

It felt present-oriented. Alive. Full of possibility.

Almost as though some deeper part of me was responding with:
“Yes. More of this.”

About an hour later, I experienced something very similar again, except this time it happened while driving past a group of newer hotels near a highway exit.

Which is objectively kind of funny when you think about it.

Trees I understand.
Hotels? Not so much.

And yet the emotional experience was nearly identical.

Why?

Honestly, I’m not entirely sure.

Perhaps hotels symbolize travel, freedom, movement, reinvention, holidays, possibility, or temporary escape from routine for me. I really don’t know.

But I do know that both moments produced the same emotional sensation.

And I think that sensation is very close to the “YEAH” feeling I’ve been pointing toward with this whole idea of getting out onto your own Highway to YEAH.

It feels distinctly different from gratitude.

Gratitude feels appreciative.
This felt expansive.

And those experiences also got me thinking about how I normally move through many of my days.

Because to be frank, I think I often operate in a fairly low-grade state of complaint, critique, distraction, analysis, or numb endurance.

You know… complaining.

Which is ironic, because I don’t like complaing. (Joke.)

But seriously, I think many people, myself included, slowly drift into a mode of living where life becomes primarily about “getting through the day.”

We shoulder responsibilities, complete tasks, manage stress, numb boredom with distractions, and then repeat the cycle again tomorrow.

That orientation feels very different from intentionally cultivating moments of genuine aliveness.

Am I alone in this?
I doubt it.

Can it be reversed?
I would like to believe so.

Now, to be fair, I don’t think it is realistic to expect constant ecstasy. Difficult things happen. Stress happens. Fatigue happens. Life includes suffering, frustration, grief, confusion, and periods of stagnation.

And perhaps this is precisely where gratitude practices serve an important function. At minimum, they encourage us to notice that not everything is wrong all the time. They shift our attention toward what is still meaningful, beautiful, nourishing, or good.

And that does matter.

But personally, I find myself increasingly wanting more from life than merely graceful acceptance.

I don’t simply want to tolerate existence more effectively.
I want to feel deeply alive inside it.

This also connects, I think, to the recent self-help movement encouraging people to “embrace boredom.” And honestly, I think there is real wisdom in that advice. Most of us immediately attempt to escape boredom through stimulation and distraction. Phones, scrolling, endless content, noise, consumption.

Kierkegaard would likely recognize much of modern digital life as an exaggerated version of what he described as the aesthetic life: endless novelty, endless stimulation, endless avoidance of stillness.

So yes, there is probably something deeply important about learning how to sit quietly again without immediately reaching for distraction.

But still…

If the highest aspiration becomes simply tolerating boredom more effectively, something about that still feels incomplete to me.

Life is a miracle.

Surely we are aiming for something more beautiful than optimized coping strategies and emotionally muted existence.

Let’s aim for something higher.

Let’s develop our ecstatic natures.