Johnny Bravo Lives!
Did you ever watch reruns of the classic 1970s sitcom The Brady Bunch?
One episode centered on Greg Brady pursuing a career as a singer-songwriter and performer.
Somehow he gets introduced to a shady, Phil Spector-ish producer who hires him to become the front man for a new act called Johnny Bravo.
Everything is exciting for Greg until he finally hears the finished recording.
It sounds nothing like what he wrote, played, or sang.
The producer finally admits:
“Listen, kid… I hired you because you fit the suit.”
(The “suit” being an Elvis Presley-style rhinestone, flashy, Vegas costume.)
I’ve been watching something that reminds me of that happening in real life here in the Pacific Northwest this summer.
And it’s… bizarre.
I’m regularly attending an open mic in Port Orchard. It’s one of my 7C’s for this summer tour, and I’ve now played there three times. The host is great, and it’s a fun venue. (See the thumbnail photo for What If You Don’t Know Your Values or Dreams?That’s the host and me on stage.)
The first night I attended, the performer list filled up quickly.
I arrived right as it started but still landed at number nine on the roster.
In a typical three-hour evening, you rotate through about three or four performers per hour, so nine to twelve performers total.
About a quarter of the way through the night, a couple walked in—a man and a woman.
He signed up for the tenth spot.
A couple more performers arrived late and grabbed the final two slots.
When my turn came, the host asked if I’d mind keeping my set to two songs instead of three or four.
No problem.
The venue closes at 8:00 p.m. on weeknights, and some earlier sets had run long. Since then, he’s wisely moved the start time up from 5:00 to 4:00 so there’s an extra hour of cushion.
Then this other guy walked on stage.
I said hello to the woman with him and learned she had recently moved here from Arizona.
“Where?”
“Scottsdale.”
“Oh… okay.”
He was probably about 6’2”, clean-cut, but dressed in a very blue-collar style.
I immediately thought, Navy guy?
Port Orchard…
Shipyard…
Makes sense.
Although Scottsdale seemed like an interesting place to Relocate from.
He played a Vince Gill cover.
His voice, guitar playing, and stage presence were exceptional.
Professional-level exceptional.
After finishing, he joked that maybe someday he’d learn the chords.
Huh?
The performance looked polished enough that I wondered if he was kidding.
His fiancée Told him that he had made her cry with the song.
It was quite the public moment.
Fast forward two weeks to yesterday, Saturday.
I returned for another open mic.
Not many performers had arrived yet, so I landed the fourth slot.
The host asked whether I’d be willing to play as many as ten songs if attendance stayed light.
“Sure,” I said. “I’ll do my four prepared songs, and then we’ll see what happens.”
After the first two performers finished, the same couple walked in.
Again they sat by themselves.
Again they interacted very little with anyone else.
After the third performer, I played my four songs.
By then more musicians had arrived, and the roster eventually filled up.
Then the clean-cut working-class hero took the stage.
He again opened with the Vince Gill song.
Then another cover.
Then he said,
“I’ll do a couple songs from my band’s new album. I haven’t played these in a while, so I apologize in advance.”
Once again…
Professional-level singing.
Professional-level guitar playing.
Professional-level stage presence.
I found myself wondering,
“Is this guy for real?”
Maybe an L.A. transplant?
Maybe From Nashville?
He mentioned the band’s name.
I looked it up.
Nothing.
After his set I complimented him and asked again for the band’s name.
He explained it was abbreviated and gave me another clue, but not the exact name that would make it easy to find online.
That struck me as a little odd.
Another thing I noticed:
Neither he nor his fiancée really talked with anyone.
They spoke when the host spoke to them or when another performer initiated a conversation (and most don’t approach them because they have a Stand-off kind of vibe)..
She filmed his performance.
And, As soon as his four songs were finished, they packed up and left—even though seven more performers still had yet to play.
As the old saying goes…
Something seemed rotten in Denmark.
Driving home, I searched a little deeper.
Eventually I found the band’s album.
I listened while following along with the lyrics.
The themes were pretty clear:
Red State vs. Blue State political divisions.
God, country, family, and strongly Christian conservative themes.
An over-the-top country rock presentation—perhaps somewhere between Kid Rock meets modern roots country.
I also remembered the names they had shared with me.
I searched the songwriting credits.
Interesting…
His name wasn’t listed.
Neither was anyone identified as the lead vocalist.
Nine of the ten songs were written by one songwriter.
The remaining song was a Jason Isbell cover.
The album was produced by MillerTime Music.
“Miller Time?”
Like the beer?
That Made me SUSPICIOUS, too.
After a little more digging, here’s what I found:
The project Is a professionally assembled act rather than a grassroots band.
The songwriter is an L.A.-based professional songwriter and musician, and not this performer at the Open mic.
The producer is a Long Term Nashville transplant, now working in Los Angeles.
Both have extensive backgrounds in Contemporary Christian music.
I found zero history on the featured singer himself.
He and his fiancée Do appear in a Couple of highly polished music videos that emphasize image and storytelling more than personal details.
The whole thing strikes me as remarkably polished.
Too polished.
All their online content is very impersonal but Yet meant to be personally Meaningful.
No details to the stories.
Just images and prose manufactured to “tug” at your heart.
Creepy and bizarre, In my opinion.
I overheard him tell the host he works at the local shipyard.
“Oh…”
“And you just happened to move here from Scottsdale.”
Interesting.
Big demand for Arizona shipyard workers up here, I suppose.
Next time they show up at an open mic which I am playing, I will be sure to play one of our future to be released songs, Given A Second Chance.
In the first verse I sing, “I got tailored with a swift algorithm, not given a choice.”
Feels about like this.
Feels like I’m, we’re, being played.
Maybe there’s an ordinary explanation, but I doubt it.
It made me very curious and I dug in on the internet this morning.
And on every dimension, this appears to be a cabal of sorts, orchestrated to present an over the top “product.”
Therefore, I will definitely keep my eye out on what happens to this incredible new grassroots, authentic, working class, phenomenon.
One thing I do think. they may have underestimated is Washington.
In my experience, we’re not nearly as divided as some parts of the country.
Cats and dogs can live together up here, just fine, and relish the differences.
People can disagree and still share a stage.
And perhaps more than anything else…
We like authentic authenticity.
The talent is undeniable.
It’s impressive.
But, it’s also bizarre and interesting to witness.
So, we’ll see where the story goes.