Owning Your Motivation And Clarifying Your Intention

Let’s go back to the three motivations I discussed in yesterday’s article.

There may be others, but I think these three cover a lot of the population interested in getting to FIRE.

• Autonomy/Escape

• Express Competence, Have Impact

• Connect and Contribute

As I shared in yesterday’s article, I think I have finally come to terms with the knowledge and self-understanding that the reason I wanted to reach FIRE was predominantly about Autonomy and Escaping the Grind.

It’s hard to admit this because it seems very self-centered and seems to indicate a lack of ambition.

But let’s turn to the other two core motivations before we continue that line of discussion.

If you want to express your competence and have an impact, you are likely the type of person who wants the time and financial freedom of FIRE so that you can put more time into a side hustle or start an organization-type project.

This is very seductive, at least it is for me.

For that reason, I think it has been hard for me to separate out “the band” or this “blog” from normal entrepreneurial thinking.

It’s a way to shield myself from needing to tell people I am not doing anything after leaving my corporate job.

“Oh, I’m not retired. I’ve been engaged in entrepreneurial projects.”

When I brought up the fact that I stopped listening to the various FIRE podcasts I used to follow and listen to regularly, it was because I began to understand that these folks have this as their core motivation.

They may have also wanted to have more autonomy and escape toxic work culture, but they are driven to make a “product” and an “organization” about FIRE.

They are evangelistic about their messaging that “you don’t want to get to FIRE and not do anything.”

They subtly and not so subtly push the idea that you need to focus on one of the other two motivations.

The last one of these Podcasts I listened to, just this past week, had a woman on as a guest. She has three businesses.

She is working all the time.

She has to build a team around her and lead that team to keep everything going.

To me, this is perhaps similar to someone like Mr. Money Mustache, who at one point was very critical of what he called the “retirement police.”

His gripe was that people were telling him he was not retired because he was getting paid and working on a) his blog and b) doing carpentry and construction work for pay.

His argument was that they didn’t understand he was only doing things he loved to do.

It’s how he wants to have fun. He cares more about internal validation than external approval or impact.

We can choose to believe him or not.

I believe him, but I think his motivation is competence and impact, just like hers.

Both the woman from the podcast and he are more motivated than I am to express competence and have an impact.

Conversely, I’m over five years into this journey, and I still feel like I haven’t achieved the full autonomy I hoped I would.

As for expressing competence and having an impact, I love writing and performing songs, but I am not out to be the next “whatever.”

The economics are ridiculous and the demands are extremely high if one wants to equate “pay” with “competence” and “impact” in the music industry.

No thanks.

I guess I am going to be pushed into the “he’s a hobbyist” musician category as a result.

So be it.

Then there are the Connection and Contribution motivations.

This is a real people person. Someone who perhaps wants to leave a legacy.

This is also seductive to me.

I mean, I love people. At least the people I love.

Yes, there are some real A-holes out there I want nothing to do with, but I think at least 95% of people are good folks and worth the time.

But again, it is a way to hide and shield my motivations for wanting to be FIRE if I say I did it so that I could make a bigger contribution and have a richer set of interpersonal relationships.

Those are wonderful things. But that’s not why I did what I did.

This is something that Mr. Money Mustache stated as a driver for his quest to FIRe. He wanted to be there to raise his very young son. I think that is fantastic.

It is also the motivation of Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin.

They wanted to show how, instead of donning a robe and a beggar bowl as a spiritual monk, you could instead play the same type of game within a capitalist system.

They were stressing equanimity, really.

Being able to discern what is “enough.”

I love it. I am so thankful for the work they have done. It was inspiring and helpful.

So, I am not saying I don’t have these other two motivations.

What I am saying is that my predominant motivation was, and still is, autonomy and freedom.

You might ask why.

That’s a good question.

Let’s see how—or if—I can answer it in future articles.